It's now been more than a month since we had our credit card transaction, and I still don't have my 5-in-1 collapsible reflector, or my Rosco gels. It's been so long since I ordered I don't even remember if anything beyond those two things was on the order.
I want you to know that I have contacted voodoo Shamanists from around the world to put pains in the bellies of your staff. I have also broken 1,000 mirrors in your name and called the lottery fairy and told her to deny all your ticket numbers until I receive my parcel from you...
I have also commenced in talking all MANNER of shit about you on the internet.
Thank you for your understanding,